resturant.jpgDon’t you just hate it when you enter an eating establishment and find that the menu is printed entirely in an unknown language? To those of us who are not “worldly,” this presents a problem. Searching the entire menu offers no explanation as to what the “Baked Chitlins alfredio” or the “scalipiota personified” consists of and does not even indicate that it is edible.

It would seem that they would include a translation somewhere for those of us who know nothing of the exotic terms used by famous chefs. It need not be elaborate, just tell us what we would be eating when we point to an item and say, “I’ll have that.”

It does not stop here. Small print below the selections of entrees, offers the “vegetable of the day.” What is this? Can they not spell mashed potatoes or green beans and corn on the cob? And do they really cook the fries at home and then bring them to the restaurant?

Also, it would seem that the longer the name, the larger the price. I have tried to figure out just what the going rate per letter in their “special of the day,” but to no avail. This too, is a closely guarded secret. To call a potato by any other name should not increase the price by one half.

Many of us enter a restaurant for only one reason. We are hungry. We do not care if the food is called cuisine or simply victuals. It matters not to us if the items are served with an exotic sauce or plain gravy. If the food is tasty and the establishment is clean, we will beat a path to your door. A sample of what we are looking for is—

Ham and ‘tater salad with okra and squash…$1.69

Steak and black eyed peas with turnips and mashed ‘taters…$2.45

Meat loaf and gravy over rice with collards and pinto beans…$1.89

Fried cat fish with fried squash and fried ‘taters…$2.22

Beef stew with stewed ‘maters and hominy…$2.16

All of the above served with biscuits, corn bread, tea and/or coffee. Large slice of apple pie included.

Take heed, all of you restaurant owners. This could mean the difference in success and failure. There are thousands of us who want nothing more than a good, tasty meal. It’s up to you.

Will you succeed or fail?