NEED AMUSING ???

A  Convent, housing fifty Nuns had never enjoyed the convenience of indoor plumbing until a wealthy man donated money for the installation of running water and toilets.

This presented the Convent with the problem of how to dispose of fifty Chamber Pots.  After prayerful thought, Mother Superior dispatched Sister Cecilia to haul the Chamber Pots to the local flea marker and sell them with the revenue to be placed in the poor box.

On the way to town, the Convents station wagon ran out of gas.  Not to be daunted by this mishap, Sister Cecilia merely removed one of the Chambers and walked to a nearby Service Station for enough fuel to start the car and drive to the pumps.

She returned to the car and proceeded to pour the gas from the Chamber Pot into the tank when a pick up truck stopped and a ‘lanky’ Farmer got out, and quietly watched until the Nun finished her task.  Only when she had replaced the pot in the back of the station wagon did the farmer speak.  “Sister; I’ll say one thing for you.”  “You have a hell of a lot of FAITH.”

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A retired couple were their favorite T.V. Show one night when the wife suddenly said, “I believe I’ll join the NOW generation.”

She went into the bedroom and returned a few moments later wearing pedal pushers, bobby socks, and a tee shirt.

Twirling in front of her husband, she asked: “Do you think I look better without a bra?’

“You sure do:” The old man replied, “Its pulled all of the wrinkles out of your face.”

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Reverend Brown was walking down the street when he saw a little boy jumping up and down in a vain attempt to reach a doorbell.  Intending to help, the Minister walked over and rang the bell for the youngster.  “Now, what do we do,” he asked the boy?

“We run like hell,” said the young man.

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An eighty year old man was telling his doctor that he had fallen in love and was planning to be married.  “That’s wonderful.” replied the doctor: “How old is the bride?”

“She is nineteen and a marvelous cook and housekeeper,” the man said.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to marry a girl that young,” said the doctor, “The difference in your ages could possibly be fatal.”

With a grin, the old man replied;  “Oh well; If she dies, she dies.”