“You’d better get up and eat. You’ve got you some Wienies.
This announcement was made by the tow headed youngster upon hearing that his brother was not feeling well enough to come to the dinner table. The place was anywhere in the rural South and the time was just after the great depression. Although food from the spacious garden spot was sufficient on the small farm, it was not as appealing to the children as ‘bought’ food. No one was overly concerned with the nutritious value of the wieners being well below that which the garden produced. Here was something different. All the children ranked wieners right up there with bought loaf bread.
The father had managed to secure a few days of ‘public work’; thus allowing him to treat his family to delicacies that, heretofore, they had been denied; hence the announcement was more of a chastisement than an appeal.
On the other hand, there were those who were not enamored with wieners. I had a relative who had never tasted meat in his lifetime. He did, however, dearly love the accouterments that are usually associated with wieners. Listening to friends describe the delicious hot dogs prepared by ‘Buck’ at the Down Town Café, made his mouth salivate. On at least one occasion, he ventured inside the small, converted railroad car and ordered, “One hot dog, all the way, but without the wienie.” So surprised was ‘Buck’ that he could not bring himself to charge for just the fixings and said, “It’s on the house.”
I can well remember when mill workers were envied simply because they usually carried to work a lunch consisting of sliced luncheon meat with mustard or mayonnaise on ‘bought’ loaf bread. To top it off, they had a ‘dope’ (soft drink) along with this delicious meal. It was not necessarily their preference but they accepted it as a convenience.
It seems that we have come full circle. From the homegrown variety of foodstuffs consumed while still on the farm, to the manufactured and pre-packaged food we lunch on while performing ‘public work.’
Today, the roadsides are overflowing with huge signs advertising restaurants that specialize in ‘home cooking.’ Of course, there will always be demand for the small cafes and diners that still serve sandwiches, including luncheon meat, and even “hot dogs without the weinies.”
Demijon
“While some go – Others come!” Dj.
March 31st, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
My child bride and I recently attended a funeral visitation for the spouse of a dear friend and former co-worker. We were fortunate that by staying in close proximity to our friend, we were spared quite a bit of embarrassment since we hardly recognized anyone.
Our friend is someone who understands us and could answer our many questions. You know the drill; (whisper), “Who is the lady in the red dress?” or “Who is the man standing by the water cooler?” or “Is that really Bob over there by the door?” “He looks so old!”
We did, however, notice a couple of strangers pointing to us and talking to another person in hushed tones; but we reasoned that they were simply commenting on our youthful appearance or our fabulous dress. Perhaps they were transplanted residents from another area who wished to simply become acquainted with such a debonair couple.
We tried to hide our dismay when noticing that our friend’s hair had become bright silver, whereas our salt & pepper tresses were much the same as when our hairdresser had labored long and hard to make us appear more in keeping with our true age.
Indeed, I am often amazed that other folks age more quickly than we. This was apparent since many of the ones in attendance seemed to know us even though their faces were unfamiliar to both my child-bride or me.
We therefore concluded that this was proof that we still retained our youthful demeanor. A few even cited an incident or two from our past, and to this, we could only reply, “uh-huh.”
There is a medical term that explains just how we have weathered the storm and retained our youth while others grow older. We discovered this term while searching for answers to a few other disorders such as Lumbago, Arthritis, Cholesterol, Eczema, Constipation, Hypertension, etc.
The medical term that best describes the two of us is “dementia;” which simply means; “Stay as young as you wish for as long as you wish and ‘Let the devil take the hind part.’ No one has to know that you are two years older than dirt.”
This description offers evidence that the old “Demijon Saying” of “Some of us still HAVE IT, while others still WANT IT.” contains a lot of truth.
Demijon
Now you know why we hesitate to associate with old folks. Dj.
March 28th, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
The young man was sleeping when a loud knock sounded at his door. Still in a dazed condition, he groped his way through the house and found two policemen just outside the entrance. “Sir, we’ll have to ask that you come with us to the station,” the tallest of them said. “What have I done?” the young man protested. “You will be told at the station,” the officer replied. The other officer secured his hands with handcuffs and they led him to a waiting patrol car.
“He fits the description given by the eye witness,” the desk sergeant retorted. He was finger printed and booked. They allowed him one phone call which he placed to his attorney, and together they prepared his defense.
Early the next day he was brought before a judge and was told that he had been charged with believing in one God and worshiping without a permit. There were very few murmurs of disbelief heard throughout the crowded courtroom as the charges were read.
When both attorneys had presented their arguments, the judge turned to the assembled crowd in the courtroom and asked, “What would you have me do with him?”
“Give him life,” said one. “Execute him,” said another. “Guilty, guilty, guilty,” shouted the assembly of onlookers. “He should be killed,” They all cried in unison!
Suddenly, the young man was awake and realized that this had been a dream. So shaken was he that he could not again summon sleep so he arose and tried to determine just what had caused this nightmare.
He realized that this was pure fantasy in this age of freedom to believe and worship as one chooses; but he could not help but remember when over 2000 years ago, a young man was tried and convicted much in the same manner, for doing nothing more than the will of his Father.
The main difference, the young man surmised, was the willingness of Jesus to submit to the cruel, unjust punishment in order that everyone who would believe in his teachings would be forgiven by his Father and thus would earn a place in his Heavenly Kingdom.
It certainly causes us to wonder that, if a similar case were to appear on today’s court dockets, could our best defense Attorneys secure an acquittal on the basis of insufficient evidence, or even a technicality. Would our laws today allow a judge to simply bow to the wishes of an unruly crowd and render a death sentence?
It really comes down to the conclusion that Jesus death, over 2000 years ago was pre-ordained by GOD; therefore, justice was served for the benefit of all mankind.
Demijon
Atheism is a non-prophet organization. Dj.
March 28th, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
While browsing at Sam’s Warehouse Club, I spied a rack containing Emergency Lights that simply plugs into receptacles within the home; (pictured at left).
Since I am infatuated with new gadgets, I invested my twenty dollars into two of these cute little boogers that my lovely roommate informed me will probably never be of any use; citing our dependable Electric Power Company.
Nevertheless, I unpacked the items and proceeded to install one in our bedroom and the other in our dining room. I was quick to explain that we would be prepared if, for any reason, we had a power failure. Needless to say; she was not impressed. However; they could become somewhat of a conversation piece for inquisitive visitors.
It has been our policy to keep night-lights strategically lit for safety within our home for years. We need these to light our way to the bath room due to our frequent visits ever since we reached the back side of Medicare.
In the wee hours of this morning, March 27, 2010, I awoke, as usual at 01:30 a.m., for a visit to the bathroom and found the whole house dark with the exception of the emergency lights. The dependable Power Company had obviously failed.
I then, went back to sleep and awoke later in the semi-darkness to determine the time of night. The two digital clocks were dark so I reached for the flashlight on the bedside table and stumbled into the living room where our Atomic, battery-powered, clock hung on the wall. The time then was 04:30 a.m. My attempts to again snooze was not to be and I rolled and tumbled for quite a while until the power came back on and the emergency lights went off.
As I write this post, I can hardly wait until my lovely roommate arises at noon to begin her online search of the hoards of catalogs that are displayed on our computer and smirk when I tell her, “TOLD YOU SO.”
Demijon
FACT: No one is listening to you; unless you Fart, Dj.
March 27th, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
Yesterday, my Wife and I decided to abandon our day-long sessions with America’s favorite Authors and to visit with Brother and his Wife.
We had hardly gotten out of our driveway when we began to think this was a bad idea. Judging from the bumper to bumper traffic on the thoroughfares, it was fairly obvious that these two old fogies had absolutely no business on THOSE folks’ roads.
We did, however, arrive safely and spent the better portion of the day catching-up on all the news, gossip, and “the remember whens?” “You name it. – We covered it.” All of this while inhaling cups of 100 proof coffee.
Even Th’ Bear was excited to get his ears “skatched” and to be the center of attention for a short period before the talk got around to all the; “Did you hear about?” “Where did you find that unique vase?” “I love the flower arrangements on your patio.” “I saw his obituary in the paper.” And of course, “Oh, it’s just an old thing that I picked up at the Mall.” etc.
An informal lunch was served that, in no way, inhibited the reminiscing until it was time to begin the trek back to the poor house. Although the inhabitants of the vehicles on the roads this time were different; they too, seemed somewhat irritated that these two silver-haired individuals with the Poodle sitting between them were in their way.
By some miracle, we arrived home safely; but totally exhausted. About all we could do was to eat a bite and crawl into the bed. I am reasonably sure that Brother and his Wife did much the same; citing the fact that they too, are on the far side of Medicare.
It is truly amazing that a couple of hours of driving on today’s highways can take the joy out of what would otherwise be a simple, relaxing visit with kinfolks.
A note to all those drivers who cussed us; while we were traveling to and from. “We apologize for being in your roads yesterday; but we feel it is our duty to inform you of this one item…”
“You may not realize it now friends; but your days of similar incidents are coming!”
Demijon
Sitting and watching the Tractor rust is not really as bad as we once thought. Right; Brother? Dj.
March 25th, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
I am constantly asked; “What do you do with your time?” Since we are retired and no longer required to earn our daily bread by the sweat of our brow, my usual response is; “We just sit and watch the tractor rust.”
Of course, this is somewhat frivolous since daily living demands that a certain amount of work be done to maintain a home and its surroundings. However, during the Winter months, these duties are limited to the small amount of labor that prevents the home from “going to the dogs.”
As soon as we are instructed to spring ahead and re-set out clocks for Daylight Saving Time, and the temperature rises above the freezing mark, our creative juices begin to flow.
Several times each day, we investigate the trees and shrubbery for signs of swelling buds that announce the imminent signs of a renewed, colorful world. Also, our eyes are glued to the television Weather Channel each evening as the Meteorologists point out the approaching “fronts” and “seven-day forecasts.”
March 13, 2010, the temperature soared to seventy one degrees. This was liken unto a dose of medicine for me. For the past five years, my workshop / storage shed had been the dumping place on our little piece of property. Whatever needed to be protected from the elements was simply thrown in anywhere there was an empty space.
After consuming my pot of 100 proof coffee and a sausage biscuit, I took shovel and broom in hand and attacked the shed with a vengeance. Removing the mowers, potting soil, fertilizers and assorted junk, occupied most of the morning. Then the cleaning of the floors and shelves began to convince me that the place was not in such bad shape, after all.
Mid-afternoon, I began to re-insert all the stuff arranged outside on the dull gray lawn and simply put it back - ‘anywhere there was an empty space.’ It was not like we were opting for a spread in Home & Garden. It’s a storage shed; for Heavens sake.
March 14, 2010; My wife succeeded in rousing me from the bed with the assistance of a 2X4, and with the help of a walker, I made my way to my recliner where I SIT AND WATCH THE TRACTOR RUST!
Demijon
One of these days, I’ll get a round ‘TUIT’ and finish the chore that enticed me so much on those first few days of Spring. Dj.
March 24th, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
Yesterday’s post disclosed the statement: ” Perhaps I’m dumb; but I don’t understand.” Later in the day, that proved to be fact. Ms. Pelosi along with the President proudly announced that the Health Reform Bill had passed and would be signed into law today, March 23, 2010.
Then, the other shoe was dropped. Reports indicated that the bill would now go back to the “other side” for review and if they changed as much as one word; the bill would be trashed and the fight would start all over again.
My question at this juncture is; “How can a bill be passed and SIGNED INTO LAW that could be disregarded as so much rubbish?”
Is there anywhere in the private sector that will permit a person to stop work and receive their pay when the job is only half-way complete? I can see no reason that our Government should be allowed to ‘sign into law’ legislation that has not been inspected and approved beforehand.
For the majority of my seventy-plus years, I have lived by the principle that; “if a job is worth doing; it is worth doing well!” Perhaps we should inaugurate this principle into the job descriptions for all elected Officials. It just “gets my goat” that our lawmakers can spend so much time and money only to have the completed production scrapped.
If indeed, the finished product was not ‘up to par,’ shouldn’t the inspector, (in this incident, The President), decide whether or not the bill is acceptable as the law of the land?
If it is approved and signed into law; why place it again into the hands of seemingly inept workers to start all over. Is there any guarantee that the second bill would be any better?
What makes the cheese more binding is that it is entirely possible that the next bill may have ‘one word.’ changed and “The Fight will Continue.” This really scares me!
Demijon
Of course, this is my opinion, and as usual it doesn’t matter. Dj.
March 23rd, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
Perhaps I’m just dumb. I simply do not understand why politicians invent cute little words; which the average voter cannot fathom, to describe some controversial legislation they are trying to pass. You know: “Pork Barrel,” “Tea Party,” etc.
In many cases, the legislation will benefit no one except the ones who had contributed the most to their election campaigns. By using the cute little “nicknames;” we, the voters, will not realize, beforehand, that the legislation will do naught to better our way of life. Why can’t they be honest and simply name the bill; “The Screw-America bill?”
They make an attempt to propose enclosures in any bill that would be satisfactory to both houses of the Congress; but when the bill is submitted for a final vote, lo & behold; it contains many amendment’s that benefit no one except the constituents of one or the other political party. And, they call this being fair to every American.
To make matters worse, the in-fighting between both houses of Congress has taken month after month of time that could be spent doing what the voters asked of them; and, at the cost of thousands of tax-payers dollars.
I am aware that our present health care plans leave a lot to be desired and I appreciate the fact that an overhaul has finally gotten the attention of our esteemed lawmakers. However, perhaps I am from the old School; but I would like to know, (in plain old American English, if you please), just how proposed legislation will effect me as well as every other citizen.
If they must have a cute nickname for the proposed legislation; why not name it “The American Plan” and require the members of both political parties to work together for the benefit of all citizens and that it does not discriminate between the have’s and the have-not’s.
If they must fight among themselves, simply issue them gloves and put them in a boxing ring. When the bell sounds, they are to come out fighting.
The rank and file of Americans would then determine the winners by casting enough votes to re-elect them… Makes sense; even to me.
Demijon
“If nominated, I will not run: If elected, I will not serve.” Dj.
March 22nd, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
Dateline – Florida; Circa 1990′s.
Hit were ’bout dark-forty-five whenst usens wuz a’eatin’ supper an’ Rocky Phil, he called th’ store an’ axed Silas iffen he wud run git his mammy to th’ telephone. Silas, he come flyin’ up ta th’ shack an’ tolt Susie Mae that her youngun were a’wantin’ ta talk wiff her on that thare telephone. Now y’all got ta unnerstand that Susie Mae, she don’t take ta them new-fangled gagets but she taken off to th’ store lik’ her pettycoat were a’far. She don’t want them younguns ta know that she’s a’scairt uv them thangs.
Whot Rocky Phil were a’wontin wus ta axe his mammy iffen usens wud come ta Floredy so he cud show us off at one uv them shin-digs whot he does ever so offen at that thare church whare he were 2nd. strang preacher. He sez ta Susie Mae that he had done axed Mr. Jack, th’ head knocker, an’ he said hit wud be all right wiff him iffen Susie Mae wud behave herself.
Well’sr, usen’s grabbed some A & P sacks an’ throwed usen’s clothes in ‘em, poured some oil in th’ log truck an’ lit a shuck fer Floredy. Susie Mae, she forgot ta put th’ lard bucket in th’ truck an’ ever time hit wud run hot, she’d have ta go down ta th’ creek an’ tote back some water ta go in th’ radeater wiff her bonnet. (It taken all th’ starch outten th’ brim).
When usen’s got to they house, Jeddy, she had jus’ got off work at th’ truck stop an’ she ‘sisted on us a’goin sommers an’ git us a hot dog. Well, when we had done an’ et, Susie Mae, she commenced complainin’ ’bout being tarred frum totin’ all that water and usen’s went ta bed.
Th’ shin-dig whot Rocky Phil were a’wontin’ us ta go to were a supper wiff a play atterwards. It were rale nice an’ he didn’t even hav’ ta fuss at his mammy nairy-a-time fer gripein’ ’bout them not havin’ no chitlin’s ner polk sallitt on that thare supper table.
Atter everbody had done et, they had them th’ play an’ Susie Mae, she took on sumpin terreble ’bout how much she ‘joyed hit. Usen’s leff th’ church ‘fore Jeddy an’ Rocky Phil an’ went on ta they house. B’then Susie Mae hit th’ door, she taken off her frock an’ wus a’settin in th’ front room in her teddy’s whenst them younguns drug in comp’ny.
Who hit were that they had brung in were Davie, Londer, an’ they youngun, Jonie frum th’ church an’ here Susie Mae sets wiff nuffin on but her teddy’s, an’ her eyeballs glued to th’ T & V. Rocky Phil didn’t ‘pear ta be as m’barrased ’bout th’ thang as Jeddy were. She were purely mortified.
Atter they got over th’ schock an’ Susie Mae had done throwed a quilt over her, usen’s had us a rale nice visit up til hit come bedtime. Now me, I ain’t never been one ta start nothin’ so I waited ’til usen’s got home fore I raked Susie Mae over the coals ’bout a’settin ’round in her teddy’s. I don’t reccon she’s ever gonna learn ta be as refined an’ cultured as me, ’round comp’ny.
Howsomever, hit were a good trip an’ even Jeddy didn’t axe usen’s whenst we wuz a’goin home but oncet ‘er twice. Rocky Phil, he tolt me that he knowed his mammy wud mess up an’ he had brung them folks into they shack whilst she were a’settin thare in her unmentionables jus ta get her ‘tention. He be’s like that.
Boff them younguns got kinda pale, right ‘fore usen’s leff whenst Susie Mae tolt them that nex time usen’s come down thare, we’d brang more clothes an’ stay fer ’bout a month. Iffen usen’s has got ‘nough time, maybe usen’s can m’press some more uv they friends.
We tries, rale hard.
Jay Henry
P.S. After observing the Parents; the state of Florida asked them to move. Jh.
March 20th, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
Use the meaning of each of the following words in a sentence.
AIRSTRIP: Mavis taken all her clothes off in front of the fan.
BIGOT: This here’s a nickname for OT Barfield atter he got growed.
CALL-GIRL; That call girl whot sez “number please” were rale nice.
DEPRESSED; Settin’ in that little seat on th’ bus depressed my pants.
EGYPT; Th’ las’ time I swapped mules with old Joe; Egypt me.
FORECLOSING; Fore closing th’ door, make shore it’s locked.
GANG; That sore on his foot got so bad that gangrene set in.
HARMONY; I borrowed some harrmoney to harr me some help.
ICE CAP; When I come in outten that freezing rain, I took off my ice cap.
JOINER; Your sister went in th’ front room. You go joiner.
KNAPSACK; I was so tarred that I crawled into my napsack and slept.
LAMINATE; I cooked me a leg of laminate it.
MALPRACTICE; Take that fiddle in there and make Mal practice it.
NET WORK; I harred on to that fishing boat to learn net work.
OAKUM; Let’s all stand and sing “Oakum to th’ church in th’ wildwood.”
PARADOX; Lem needs a paradox to tie up both his boats.
QUAKER; A feller whot cleans up atter a Earthquake.
REVISED; Them boards come undone, an’ Jeb re-vised ‘em.
SLICKER: The sole’s of my shoes are slicker than a soap-maker’s butt.
TAINT; You told me Bubba was rich; ‘taint so.
UNDERRATE; Your ticket at the movies costs a quarter if you’re underate.
VIEWFINDER; I bored a hole in the girls bathroom and made a viewfinder.
WELL-BRED; The third time the Cow got into the Bull’s pasture, she were well-bred.
XEROX; Pedro and Pancho spends a heap of time a’throwin’ zerox at each other.
YAWL; It shore were nice of yawl to come see us.
ZEBRA; The top of a Spanish woman’s underclothes is ze-bra.
Demijon
Questions may be asked. Dj.
March 18th, 2010
Posted by
demijon |
Uncategorized |
no comments
